Ok, I am going to open myself up here and voice my opinion. I think I have a reputation for that...I am interested to know what others think, because at the moment, I am feeling rather alone in this and I would like to know if anyone out there agrees with me. And if you don't.....that's ok, just don't tell me! ha ha
So here is the issue at hand:
Last week Abe's 6th grade teachers sent home a letter announcing that "Maturation Week" is coming up and there would be a parent meeting to preview the material that would be taught. The letter stated that they would be covering topics such as puberty and the birth process.
Ok, so I wasn't about to miss this meeting. Although, I had already pretty much made up my mind that I was going to not have Abe participate in this program, I wanted to be responsible and at least go and see firsthand what the material was going to be like.
I thought I would go a few minutes early so as to get a good seat in what I thought would be a crowded classroom right? WRONG! The "crowd" consisted of me and one other couple! Does that shock anyone but me??? What is wrong with people??? I asked the teachers what the feedback had been so far and they said that most of the forms had already been turned in and all had checked YES, that their child could participate. Without even knowing the material??!! I am sorry but that shocks me. OK, so I get over that and move onto view the video.
I am not a prude or naive, and yes, I know kids need to eventually learn this stuff....but I can say that I was very uncomfortable with this material. While I am sure most people would say it is well done, I felt really uncomfortable sitting there having pictures of penises and vaginas and pubic hair flashing in front of my eyes! Granted, they weren't actual photographs, but very detailed drawings. They discussed things such as erections and ejaculation with detailed pictures. I don't think that 11 and 12 year olds should have this put in front of them with their peers sitting there. Yes, they do separate the boys and girls, but still...and then the teachers tell them that if they walk out of the room and utter one word about it on the playground, they will be sent home for the day. Isn't that a mixed message? Get them all stirred up inside and expect them to have the maturity to not say anything about it! The hope is that they will go home and talk to their parents about it, but chances are that will only happen in a small percentage of families.
I just have such a problem with once again, the government stepping in and hiding behind the facade that they are putting the child first and looking out for them by teaching this at school because it won't be taught in the home. IT is not that I really have a problem with the information being presented. I just don't agree that it should be taught IN SCHOOL. I suggested the idea afterward that it would be great if they could have the video available for parents to check out and take home and view it with their child at home where it was in a comfortable setting. I think they were rolling their eyes inside their heads at me. THe woman teacher was very nice and respectful of how I felt, but the man was not saying much at all. THe other couple thought the video was great and they left shortly after saying they were happy it was being taught in school.
This is my thought...I know this is too ideal, but wouldn't it be so awesome if they could instead, take a week and teach things such as respecting your body, boys respecting girls, modest dress, clean language, appropriate media and entertainment....in fact, all the stuff in the "For the Strength of Youth" handbook. I think that is much more age appropriate and so much more beneficial.
They always say that they have to teach this because kids don't learn it at home. You know what? Many many generations of kids grew up not being taught this in school and they did just fine. IN fact, it was a much more wholesome world back when it wasn't talked about so much! Yes, I agree that many kids will not learn this at home, but don't jeopardize those kids who have parents who actually are having these discussions at home. To me, it is something that has to be taught with the spirit and will that be present in school? NO.
I would like to see a study done showing me that even one kid abstained from premarital sex because they saw this great video in the 6th grade.
I think all this does is embarrass them and raise their curiosity so that many of them will probably want to go home and search out some real photos on the internet!
I know, I know, I am really charged up about this. I am not saying that every 6th grader is going to go home and look at porn, but you get my point.
It is not that I think seeing any of this would really hurt Abe,we have already had several discussions with him on these topics, so it will not be anything new to him. It is just the principle of it for me that as long as EVERYONE does it, then the school system thinks that no one has a problem with it and that all parents want it.
I don't have a problem with them talking about acne and the need for deodorant etc...but let's leave the nakedness and bodily fluid parts out of it.
Abe will probably be the only one that will go with the other teacher and be taught the "alternative program", where they will learn insignificant things such as how to deal with peer pressure, the danger of gang violence and how to make healthy eating choices. (of course I am kidding about the insignificant part)
Yes, he may feel a little dumb about being the only one, but maybe the best lesson in all of this for him will be that it won't be the last time he will have to be the only one doing something different and he will know that his parents aren't afraid to take a stand on something.
I left the meeting and went to Becky's house to get on the elliptical machine and burn off my frustration...but I didn't quite get it all out, so I thought I would finish venting on my blog.
Thanks for "listening"
